i know i've been warned about raising teenagers! on how hard it is! on how hard it is going to be! but why didn't someone warn me it would be SO HARD! anxiety- wanting- to -pull -my -hair -out -and -cuss- HARD! i'm a Christian girl who tries to keep my language and attitude like that of Christ, but i must admit i'm failing miserable. i've even thought about my husband and i running away from the kids. (don't get me wrong. my kids are my world and i love them more than anything.) but they don't get me. i don't get them anymore. i keep telling myself that i must be doing something right since my daughter has said she hates me like everyday for the past year. they say if your kids like you that you are not doing your job as a parent. so hearing that i must be getting a A+, right? i mean i know that she just says this when i put my foot down and don't let her do some of the things she wants to do. but it still hurts my feelings. then i end up hurting her feelings. it's so frustrating. frustrating that i can't hold my temper with her when she spats back at me with her words. anyone out there hear me on this?
brady says last night at 9 that he needs batteries for school. I say "batteries" he says "yeah" i said "this would have been nice to know when we were at wal-mart a minute ago." he than says " well i really don't need them, but i do" ugh?? i ask what that's suppose to mean and he says " we'll i just need them for my shock pen" i'm thinking he DOES NOT need the batteries. it just seems like lately this is our nights. every night. added with all the running from activity to activity. added to my anxiety. so i'm feeling exhausted and numb.
which brings me to why i've started a new bible study called UNGLUED.... hoping this helps me control my actions and outburst while trying to raise these teenagers.
i know i was difficult too as a teen. maybe it is payback time. i give. i really give.